Indignant To Intensely Passionate

I grew up in a strict religious family but never heard the gospel at church or from devout family members. Instead, I witnessed a continual display of repetitive rituals from leaders and people trying to earn God’s forgiveness and work their way to heaven.

After finally hearing the message of salvation through faith in Jesus Christ from my boyfriend (now husband, Joe), God began dealing with my heart and skewed theology. Eventually, I realized how sinful I was, how desperately I needed His forgiveness, and how I could never “earn” my salvation but must receive it freely by grace through faith.

At 20 years old, I committed my life to Jesus—but I was angry for several years afterward. I had intense amounts of resentment, animosity, and disgust in my heart toward those who appeared to represent God but failed to speak the truth or teach biblically correct doctrine.

I was also sickened by those who blindly followed their deceptive teaching, thinking they could earn their way to heaven or add to what Jesus sufficiently accomplished on the cross with His blood.

I wish I could say Jesus instantaneously delivered me from those intense feelings one day. But it took years of the Holy Spirit gradually renewing my mind, changing my heart, and convicting me of my sinful attitude to ultimately convert much of my hostility into a deeply rooted passion for helping people know God’s Word and the gospel.

I still struggle at times with keeping my emotions in check when I encounter false teachers or individuals trying to “work their way to heaven.”

However, my anger of the past manifests as more of an agonizing burden in my spirit over the eternal consequences awaiting those not trusting Jesus for salvation but themselves or their works. So, I pray Jesus opens their eyes to see the truth and be saved while doing my part to present His Word in love.

What about you? How are you using the intense emotions from your past for God’s glory and others’ good?